A spider has laid eggs in the side of my face.
The turgid mass has grown so large that surely, at any moment, it will burst and spew forth dozens of arachnid progeny. I am certain of this.
The lump is definitely not a massive zit that I have manhandled to the point where the resultant purple and yellow bruise is scaring small children.
No. A spider has laid eggs in the side of my face. I am certain of this.
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Oh… ooooohh that just gave me so many painful goosebumps. Well done. And sorry.
If only I could leave well enough alone…
That. Is. Awesome. I wish I thought of that when I had chronic acne. Now if I skip a day of proactive then the spiders come in mass and lay their eggs in my face while I sleep.
Now that is just plain terrifying!